This Destructoid story features a trailer for the upcoming PS3 game Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2. Usually, a trailer is meant to advertise a new game by showing off exciting game play or impressive visuals. Tecmo, the company behind Ninja Gaiden Sigma 2, went with a different approach and released a trailer on the player’s ability to jiggle breasts.

This is a risky move by Tecmo. It’s a move that spits in the face of convention by focusing on a very small game play mechanic to advertise the entire game. Actually, what am I talking about? Tecmo released a trailer that features giant breasts the user can control by moving the controller. I hope they rented a second factory to press copies.

But let’s examine this trailer a bit further.

If the people in the trailer accurately represent the Japanese gaming community, the Japanese government might want to name the release date a national holiday. Hopefully someone at Tecmo contacted Jergens so they can ramp up production.

The motion made in the trailer could symbolize masturbation, but I’m a little concerned about the form. This trailer and game may be an introduction to masturbation for a lot of people. Right now, it looks like Tecmo is teaching very poor technique.

It seems very risky to mimic your hand’s movement with your head and neck. Sometimes, like while masturbating on horseback or while calming your nerves before the Titantic sinks, it’s impossible not to move your head and neck. But doing so on a regular basis is asking for long-term health problems.

All of Tecmo’s advice isn’t bad. On their YouTube page for the video, the description reads “Be Silent.” I think this is good advice for the would-be masturbator, especially if other people are in the house or if you’re under the bed of a small child.

Maybe I’ve Got It All Wrong

It’s easy to watch this trailer and think that the movements symbolize masturbation but maybe the whole thing is innocent. I mean, look at that guy in the robe near the end of the trailer. Who gets into a robe and pours himself a glass of wine before jerking off? I’ve heard of winos jerking off into robes they found by the subway, but that’s different.

I watched the trailer again to be sure that I wasn’t being too hard on Tecmo, and I did notice something.

Look at that poor butterfly stuck on her left breast. I think I know what’s going on. This “tit-tremor” feature is really a game play mechanic used for the game’s subplot of rescuing that trapped butterfly. I wonder if you can slam the breasts together to try and jar the butterfly loose? Its wings appear intact, so there’s no reason it won’t be able to fly once freed.

Conclusion

Tecmo wants people to talk about their game. and this trailer almost guarantees that will happen. Is it important that no one is talking about the game play or the graphics? I don’t know. I’m guessing that Tecmo doesn’t care why you buy the game, as long as you buy the game.