Courtney Love Is Suing Over Guitar Hero 5

A couple weeks ago, I saw a story on Adfreak about how Activision was including a playable avatar of Kurt Cobain in Guitar Hero 5. I was a little confused by the announcement because it didn’t have anything to do with Courtney Love, and everyone knows that if you mention Kurt Cobain, “Courtney Love” must follow his name somewhere in the paragraph.

I didn’t understand Courtney Love’s silence on the issue, but I figured she had shut herself in a closet somewhere so she could practice making faces in the mirror. I knew that, sooner or later, we’d all get the treat of hearing her take on the situation.

And boy did we luck out. I expected some kind of self-congratulatory comment from Love about getting Cobain in the game for his fans or whatever. But Courtney decided that Christmas should come early this year and then went crazy.

The Tweets

Where did Courtney Love choose to announce that she was suing Acitivision over the use of Kurt Cobain’s likeness in Guitar Hero 5?  No, all the bathroom stalls at the Hard Rock cafe must have been full. Instead, Love decided to post two barely coherent posts on Twitter at around five in the morning on September 10th.

I read through some of Courtney Love’s past tweets before writing this post so I could get a feeling for her writing style and the content that she usually tweets about. Before I post her two “suing Activision” tweets, I feel it’s important to tell you that Courtney Love uses Twitter like it’s a free-writing exercise prescribed by her psychiatrist. Almost all of her tweets are continuations of previous tweets, which makes me think that Courtney Love sees Twitter’s character limit as some kind of unfortunate bug that will only get fixed if she constantly makes it occur. Because of this, and because she’s Courtney Love, it’s almost impossible to figure out what she’s talking about.

Ok, here we go.

Tweet #1 — “we have NOTHING to do with this it was presented to me and oi said “show me a better avataR” TO DRAG MY HEELS., never did i intend on allowi”

Followed immediately by Tweet #2 — “allowing GUITARHERO for me or for Kurt i am NOT yoko fucking Ono no ofense to her, but i am a different person entirely and this is insane”

I like how in the first tweet she basically admits to fucking around with Activision by making them produce a better avatar of Kurt Cobain even though she never intended to allow Cobain’s appearance in the game. That’s nice, Courtney. I’m glad you tried to waste the time of the designer who spent countless hours trying to get your dead husband’s stupid fucking hair to drape correctly.

What does she mean by “allowing guitarhero for me or for kurt?” Maybe she’s mad because she tried to get Activision to include an avatar of Courtney Love in the game, but Activision refused because it’s impossible for programmers to accurately code how Love’s drug-riddled body would dance to a song by Peter Frampton or Wolfmother.

My favorite part of these tweets is Courtney Love’s random attack on Yoko “Fucking” Ono. We have to remember that Twitter only allows 140 characters per post, so Love must have really wanted to get that Yoko Ono jab in. And when’s the last time you heard someone replace a person’s middle name with profanity and then follow that with “no ofense to her?” Courtney Love just turned Yoko Ono’s name into something you scream when the car breaks or when you drop a bunch of dishes. In fact, I’m going to replace “UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE” with “YOKO-FUCKING-ONO.”

“Bryan, I’ve been cheating on you.”

“YOKO-FUCKING-ONO”

Activision’s reponse to all of this is that Courtney Love signed off on the project and was even  involved in the development process. It’s possible that Courtney Love forgot about the whole thing after her copy of the contract was left on the coffee table under all the money Activision gave her. And I think it’s important to know if the contract was made out of cigarette paper. If so, there’s no chance Courtney Love still has her copy.

Cobain In Game

Here’s an example of Kurt Cobain’s avatar in Guitar Hero 5.

Now, some people are saying that it’s stupid and disrespectful to be able to use the Kurt Cobain avatar for other songs. But I’d like to remind these people that this is a video game, a video game you play with plastic guitars.

And what’s wrong with these songs by other artists? Why is a cartoon-image of Kurt Cobain too good to sing a cover song? When I look at that video, I see a happy Kurt Cobain goofing around on stage. This is a welcome change from the sold-out mope-fests that Cobain performed when he was alive. And, guess what, at those mope-fests he performed cover songs. In the video, Cobain’s reanimated cartoon-self decided to replace Dave Grohl on drums with some kind of demon skeleton. I think this answers the question of whether or not Kurt Cobain went to hell.

Conclusion

I found the original story of a Kurt Cobain avatar in Guitar Hero 5 interesting because it seemed like a great way to market a band that’s been broken up since 1994. This Courtney Love tantrum seems like an even better way. I haven’t heard people talk this much about Nirvana since Cobain killed himself. And since it’s impossible for Cobain to kill himself every couple years, Nirvana needs other types of marketing.

I hope this whole Courtney Love thing doesn’t ruin the chances for a Nirvana branded music game much like “The Beatles: Rockband.” For that game’s plot, I suggest that Cobain rises from the earth much like that mummy in “The Mummy” movie and the only way he can reclaim his bodily fluids and tissue is to rock the fuck out at a series of Nirvana comeback concerts. I’m still working on the title but “Guitar Hero: Nirvana: Rockin’ From My Grungy Grave” has a nice ring to it.

cartoon via Penny-Arcade

Tagged as: courtney love, guitar hero 5, kurt cobain, nirvana